What I would say to my friends in relationships

You don't want to get into this. It's a mess. What you're doing will lead to heartbreak. And it's your heart that will be broken. I know how you feel, "it'll be fine, they're great people" and they are! But at this time in your life there's so much going on that it likely won't last. At this point, we're just in high school (well I'm almost out. But you're not!) So much is changing, especially people. You are risking your heart and your trust on something and someone that ultimately will change, likely drastically.

Don't you know I've been where you are? I know how it is, how strong the emotions are, as well as the chemicals. I know what you want-I wanted it too.

But to fall in high school also means you'll hit bottom. Hard.

Yeah, we're talking heartbreak. Gut-wrenching pain and ages of regret. You're probably thinking that they'd never do that, but you don't know. They may have never intended to, but that's the scary thing about dating is you either get married or break up, and commitment is not a common trend.

It only is worse if your relationship was also physical to any degree. The easiest heartbreak I had was over a relationship that was mostly internet based. Any kind of touch creates a deeper attachment. It's like a bandaid- ever ripped one of those suckers off? The tighter they are stuck, the more it hurts.

Oh and what if they aren't who you think they are? You think they're honest, caring, but if they're looking for loopholes in your standards then they didn't care about you, not as a person. Perhaps as a body. Or as someone to boost their low self-esteem.

That's the other thing, isn't it-do you care about them or do you care that they care about you? This is a trap I fell for. In high school, there's so much insecurity. (There a song that illustrates) Everyone is growing into themselves and everything is changing. Relationships do seem to offer the illusion of stability at an ever-changing time, and a delusion of self-worth, because your significant other loves you right? What happens when you break up? Just because they're good people does not mean they're confident.

High school relationships are never for the right reasons. Never, ever date someone who you only like because you want them to like you. Never date for insecurity, and please for heaven's sake never date for stability-not happening in high school.

It may be nice to hold their hand for a few months (and maybe other stuff, ew) but the end isn't worth it. Only date when you can care about someone for who they are, and when their feelings do not affect your self-esteem. Only date to prepare for marriage, and only date people you trust. Avoid those who pressure you, who put you down, and who can't be independent.

That means wait til college. Please. It is not worth it, I cannot express how not worth it this is. Stay away from anything more than friendship-that's drama enough.

Sincerely,
Someone who cares